Well the scale has started moving again. Thank goodness. I was almost a whole week with no real loss and I was starting to get worried. I know I shouldn’t be a slave to the scale and I’m not in the sense that it doesn’t control what I eat or do, but I’ve gone through this drastic life change and I’d like to see some results. Other than farting, that is. I am SO gassy still, it’s not even funny. And it doesn’t seem to matter what or when I eat it comes no matter what. At least it isn’t painful anymore… just annoying.
I don’t have much to report. I’m very down these last few days. Money troubles (again or still? I can’t decide which is more accurate) but supposedly disability has all my paperwork and is reviewing my file. I’m going to call on Monday to see if they’ve made a decision yet because the same day as I got that phone call I had been on the phone with someone who said they were still missing papers. So I want to clarify if they’ve got them or not.
A girl on my facebook asked me if I’d like to have some of her clothes that don’t fit her anymore. I am happy to report I was able to say “no thanks” to the size 4x clothes, but happily accepted all the 2 and 3x clothes. I haven’t got them yet, but I’m looking forward to it.
I’m in such a bad mood lately. I know part of it is being off my psych meds and part of it is being lonely but I just want to curl up in bed and sleep forever. I am mourning the loss of food, too. I’m kinda ticked at myself because I can’t do what I want or eat what I want anymore. And I know it’s not healthy but I miss eating away my pain. Now I can’t do that and I have no idea how to deal with the crap I’m going through.
Well I’m going to stop here. There’s no point rambling and getting myself more upset.
Todays Weight: 268.4
Starting weight: 320
Weight in hospital: 285.3
Total weight lost: 51.6