Yesterday I went and had my follow-up appointment at the Bariatric Clinic and it went very well. My nurse said I’m healing well and moving around better than most. My scars are hardly noticable and my bruising is almost gone. She confirmed I’ve lost about 50 lbs total, and16 since last week. She says I’m doing excellent. She has no real concerns about my healing but I told her I’m concerned for myself.
I feel great. More than great, actually, and it’s not good because I feel like why can’t I just eat normal food? I’m so SICK and TIRED of being on liquids. It’s been a month since I’ve had a real meal and I want one desperately. Since I haven’t had any pain, nausea or dumping syndrome I almost feel like I’m capable of jumping off the prescribed diet and moving to real food. She assured me I’m NOT and that this would be a VERY BAD IDEA.
She says she sees many people who feel fine and then eat and overdo it and then end up in the ER with excrutiating pain thinking they’ve burst a staple. Sometimes they do burst a staple. I also feel bored sometimes when Sean and Zoey aren’t around and reverting back to old habits the first thing I think of is what is there to eat? This is also a very bad thing because I don’t want to sabotage myself. If I start eating out of boredom, it’ll never stop and this won’t be successful.
I did have a bite of tuna today after I made Zoey her sandwich. It wasn’t too big a jump because I’m allowed to eat it this time next week, but still it frightened me. I have no pain or side effects so I didn’t overdo it this time, but I’ll have to be more careful in the future. I know Sean isn’t going to be happy when he reads that. He’s already too concerned about me. I’ll be fine, but I hate disappointing him and he worries way too much.
I asked my nurse if I could go back to work seeing as how I work at an office with no heavy lifting but she said no. I should wait for my diet to stabilize – for me to be able to eat food and drink all my water without problems. Without paying too much attention. She said she sees lots of people who go back to early and who fail because they didn’t bring enough food, or they didn’t bring the right kind of food, and end up eating too much, not enough, or poor choices. So I’ll stay home a few more weeks. Twist my arm LOL
I also asked about my bowel problems. Turns out I’m part of the lucky 3% who gets the runs instead of constipation. I think I’d rather have loose stool than constipation. I’ve never been constipated but Zoey has before and it looks very painful. At least I have no pain. I was gassy again today but no pain involved any more so I think I’m ok.
Oh well. Zoey is watching Spriderman 3 and it’s distracting me. I haven’t talked with Sean in a few hours so I’m going to go spend some time with them.
Todays Weight: 272.2
Weight lost since surgery: 285.3 – 272.2 = 13.1
Weight lost since starting Optifast on April 30 = 291.4 – 272.2 = 19.2
Weight lost since last year when I started this process = 320 – 272.2 = 47.8